Sunday, December 17, 2006

See this??

My mom and I went out shopping yesterday morning at the mall. We had to park 3 aisles apart and met at the front door. Thank God for cell phones!!! The crowds were horrendous and the lines to check out were at least 30 minutes each. I love this time of year!!!

My mom is not a shopper. She hates it with a passion. So as soon as we walk into the first store and see the sea of people, my mom turns to me and said..."Only an idiot would be here on a day like this!" This of course gets me laughing, (we are both there) so she gives me the evil eye, grins and takes my kids to buy me something for Christmas. I finished up the last bit of shopping I had to do for people other than Gunz' and our children. I got a $42.00 sweater for $18.00...so it pays to fight the crowds.

I have been reminding Gunz all week that we were going to the mall that evening and let the kids pick out things they want, and then go back and get it later. It was far worse at 6pm then it was at 11am, let me just leave it at that. heehee

The girls are trying on clothes and I am keeping mental records of what they want. Gunz was so cute standing in the juniors section. He was easy to find at 6'5"...My son is standing in the junior girls section with the same fun filled expression as Gunz, so Gunz said..."We're gonna go, we'll be back", and off they go. We are still looking for clothes for one of the girls (we had 3 with us)...when my son and Gunz come strolling back. They had already got my boy figured out....hahaha. I think it took them 10 minutes, tops.

The kids then name off music they want so off to the music store to find what they are looking for. I thought Gunz would stroke when he saw some of the covers for the cd's. "No way am I buying that trash!" he then turns to me and says..."did you see the cover?" I am giggling of course and remembering my mom fussing about AC/DC and other stuff that is now classic. *sighs*

After we finished, we go back to my house and eat pizza, until Gunz and his girls leave and I start wrapping presents. My tree is slowly getting presents under it and I can't wait to see all 4 kids faces as they open up their presents. It will be a great Christmas.

I gotta go, there is another huge sale on today! The mall beckons me...

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Gunz' Shrapnel

I have to tell this story on Gunz. It is too funny to pass up and well, I am just that kind of woman...Winter is here in all of it's glory for the area in which Gunz and I live. The temperatures drop well below 20* F ( 6*C) at night, but can swing up to the mid 50's (9*C) in the daytime. In January and February, it gets brutal here, and 10*F can feel warm! It is nothing for the temperatures to be in the -15* F range, in the daytime! Water pipes are known to freeze in this area and rupture...It's that cold!
We had a weather WARNING for Sunday night. "Dress warm, keep your house warm, watch the pipes, it will drop to around 17*F (-8*C for Hoving!) tonight." Now, Gunz loves the winter. As a matter of fact, he still wears t-shirts in the winter with no coat! I, on the other hand, sit under a blanket, with a heating pad to keep warm...

So there is my baby, watching TV on Sunday night. It was football of course! All of the sudden Ka-BAAM! Shrapnel goes flying everywhere in his room! Oh God what was that??? HIT THE DECK!!!


It was his air conditioner!!! Yes, Gunz was STILL running his airconditioner in 17* F weather...It was soooooo cold, that ICE formed on the INSIDE of his air conditioner, (and the inside of his house for that matter) it FROZE the fan unit completely and eventually exploded, all inside of his house!

Gunz tells me about it Monday night, and I, being the loving and supportive woman I am, laughed hysterically for...oohhh...uummm...well... ummm... 3 days now! So late Sunday night, when the rest of you were warm and cozy in your houses, while leaving the brutal cold outside, my Gunz was picking up the frozen pieces of his air conditioner...

And...NO...I am NOT buying him an air conditioner for Christmas! LOL

Laters! I love you Gunz!!! :-D

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

GUNZ Theme Song Added...

I'm adding a theme song and placing it over my profile pic. It's a message to all those clueless liberal loons and other diseases out there that get pissed at about anything I have to say. I'd take great pleasure in sending them a few quarters to call someone who cares if I knew how to get it to them. I make no apologies either...

I'm simply done with any kind of attempt to get along with those hypocritical nut jobs. They can kiss my non-politically correct A**!

GOD Bless these United States.




As the song goes: "I am and I'm me". Rub some dirt on it.

Monday, December 04, 2006

Dear Abby, (Male Version)


Dear Abby,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some time now that my Wife has been cheating on me.

The usual signs... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."

I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi? I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.

I decided I was going to park my Harley Davidson motorcycle next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my Harley, that I noticed that the valve covers on my engine seemed to be leaking a little oil.



Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the dealer?

Thanks,

Bob

H/T to Rodeo Of The Mind

Friday, December 01, 2006

I'm Back!!!

Hello everyone! I am back. My kids are thrilled to death and came running up to me with hugs, kisses and smiles. Gunz and I missed each other loads! I can tell you I am glad to be back home. I am tired, cold, and I have so much to get done, but I am so happy to be back home that I can't stand it!

I have a few adventures to tell you about later on, after I get settled again, but I must admit, that was the BEST seminar that I have ever been on in my entire career! The food was amazing, the hotel room was larger than my entire downstairs!!!...and the content discussed was relavent, interesting, and necessary.

You will be happy to know that Gunz and his laptop have been reunited. I made it back home with his laptop just in time for his electricity to go out, due to a poweroutage for most of the town! Furthermore, we fired up his laptop and the battery died within 2 minutes, because some teacher used it all day! HAHA. So there is my baby, sitting in his house, with no electricity, and no computer...again! Poor guy!

Anyway, I am exhausted and I have some people who severely need my attention...so laters!

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Flaming liberal...

The visual definition of a 'not so bad' flaming liberal...




Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Untitled...

To my legion of faithful readers I'm saddened today. Ebyjo has some official school business to attend over the next couple of days out of town. I'm volunteering my pretty new laptop so that she has what she needs for her trip to git-r-done.

I'm not going anywhere however. But I will be stuck with my very old, very slow, very pain in the a$$ old PC to carry on my blogging endeavors during this very dark period of time in my life.
Ummm can you say windows 98? Paint dries quicker than that thing boots up. Oh well, it's just for a couple of days. :(

I'll be coming around visiting your blogs as usual if I don't crash and/or freeze in the process. There's nothing I won't do for that woman LOL. Ebyjo: I better still have all that purple space left on my memory pie. You might like the color blue but I don't....

Have a safe and productive trip dear. I'll probably still be trying to boot up the whole time you're gone. Don't worry about me... :) Hugz!

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Memories Old and New...


See the picture? Gunz bought me the Gevalia Coffee/Tea set, because he knows I love Gevalia coffee. I got it a few days ago and I love it so much, I had to display it now.

Gunz had his girls this weekend and I had my son and daughter, so my kids and I decorated the tree. It brought back so many memories, both old and new. Listening to the Christmas songs, some that my grandparents listened to as they put up their own tree, and seeing things Gunz has given me, caused memories to flood my mind, while tears fell.

When I was in my 20's and I had my own apartment, I bought my own Christmas tree ornaments. They were pretty and they all matched. My tree had a "theme". You know, those decorator kinds in magazines that look pristine. The problem was, the tree had no soul.

In 1995, the Ohio River flooded and many people lost entire homes, cars, and even lives. I only lost my pristine and delicate Christmas ornaments. As I cried over the ruined tree, my mother remembered my grandparent’s decorations that had been left untouched in their house. I inherited their decorations, but more than that, I inherited their memories.

Christmas tree bulbs, ornaments, and decorations from different eras, different times and different lives were in those boxes. Some of the ornaments are from WWII. I know a few for sure are from the 50's. There are at least 6 hand painted glass ornaments from Bavaria.

I can remember as a child decorating the tree and handing ornaments to my grandmother. The stories, and memories she shared about her own life were being hung as she smiled at each one. Stories poured from her and misty eyes gazed upon the tree of love. Her tree not only lit up the room, but it lit up our lives.

Each year, and I can't explain why, I always buy one ornament. Not just any ornament, but one that “speaks” to me. Friday night, my children and I made one last stop and as we passed the aisle of ornaments, one set caught my eye. They were a replica of the hand painted Bavarian ornaments that I inherited from my grandparents. My hand shook, and tears filled my eyes as happy memories flowed and I could see my grandmother and grandfather lovingly adorn their tree. The love enveloped me, and I bought the memory.

My tree has WWII bulbs, hand painted Bavarian bulbs, paper decorations my children colored when they were younger, and decorations that I made as a child. There are now 6 stockings hanging on the rail of my staircase. Seasonal figurines are all over my tables, bookcases, entertainment center. Vases that Gunz gave me that were once full of flowers are now filled with glass balls and surrounded by lights. The love notes he wrote and placed on the flowers are hanging on my tree now as ornaments. Memories of a new love, mixed with the love already there will make this Christmas special.

My tree is not a decorators dream, but it has soul…

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Just for S&G's...

Never ask a Gunny: For Jarhead


A young Marine officer was in a serious car accident, but the only visible permanent injury was to both of his ears, which were amputated. Since he wasn't physically impaired he remained in the Marines and eventually rose to the rank of General. He was, however very sensitive about his appearance. One day the General was interviewing three Marines for his personal aide. The first was an aviator, and it was a great interview. At the end of the interview the General asked him, Do you notice anything different about me?

The young aviator officer answered, why yes, sir. I couldn't help but notice that you have no ears. The general got very angry at the lack of tact and threw him out.

The second interview was with a female Lieutenant, and she was even better. The General asked her the same question, Do you notice anything different about me?

She replied, Well, sir, you have no ears. The General threw her out also. The third interview was with a Marine Gunny. He was articulate, looked extremely sharp and seemed to know more than the two officers combined (surprise).

The General wanted this guy, and went ahead with the same question, Do you notice anything different about me?

To his surprise the Gunny said, Yes sir; you wear contacts lenses.

The General was very impressed and thought, what an incredibly observant Gunny, and he didn't mention my ears. And how do you know that I wear contacts? The General asked.

The sharp-witted Gunny replied, Well, sir, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no freaking ears.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

For Halloween...

Here is a statue marking the grave of a young woman, in a local cemetary near Gunz and me.


The legend has stood for almost 100 years that the angel statue has a "handprint" on the left cheek of the face. The young lady was a pregnant wife whose drunken husband slapped her in a fit of anger. She fell down the stairs to her death, and also the death of her unborn child.


The husband grieved when he realized what he had done and erected this statue in her honor. Shortly after it was set in place, an image of a handprint appeared on the statue's left cheek. The statue has been sandblasted, sanded, painted, and even recovered. The handprint remains. Notice the weathering on the entire statue, except the left cheek.


She died in 1911. Even after 95 years, the handprint on the left cheek of the statue has not changed since I first saw it back in the 80's. My mother says it hasn't changed since she was a child and the legend continues.

When I first walked up to the statue to take the photos for
SugarCat, I had a very surreal feeling. I can tell you that the texture of the statue is as worn as the rest of the tombstones, gravemarkers and mausoleums of the same era, except for the left cheek of the statue. You can visibly see the surface is far smoother and lighter than the rest of her. When you are directly infront of her, you can see slight lines going in the same directions, it is in the shape of a human hand.

The legend also states that on the night of a full moon, that you can touch the stomach of the statue and it is warm, even in the winter months. I am not trying that! So I will take their word for it...

Take it for what it is worth...

Happy Halloween...

Friday, October 27, 2006

Warrior Brothers



'Warrior Brothers'
--For all of mine: Semper Fi--

There is a spirit that makes warrior's brothers
For together this band of neighbors
More tightly bound
By a special sense in combat found
Brothers by war infernal
Made fraternal
Looked into the eyes
Of the master of lies
Threatening tyranny on freedom’s sod
Challenged that bestial war God.

Brothers cast in war's dark shadow as one,
Forged civilization’s destiny with a gun
Felt a hellhounds fetid breath
Under war's wheels forevermore wielding death
Carried freedom's torch in youth’s unripe hands
Far and away to impassioned foreign lands
Swords drawn in hatred from battle's sheath
Around them swirling hostility's unholy wreath
Struggling mightily in inharmonious crescendo
Blasted by vengeful heat’s ingenuous inferno

These brothers in arms faced the barbaric demon
All for one bore valor uncommonly in war common
Contending with liberty’s foes
Hellfire scorching blackening souls
Combat brothers knelt before morality's alter
In prosecuting hallowed duty dared not falter
Body and spirit mortally wounded
As a battle of clashing souls immorally exploded

Embattled “Boys next door” prayed together
Cursed war’s whorehounds together
Held there by war’s darkning tether
Ever seeking the inner courage
Forever facing in grim revenge
Humanities great carnage
Finally at long last, from traumatic past
Finally understanding mankind’s major need
The love, peace and brotherhood creed
In fervid nightmares their credo does bleed

Brothers fought side-by-side together
Soldiers long ago slowly dying together
Crossing swords with our nation’s vile oppressor
A nation’s youth aching in a feud of blood
Unsullied honor in fiendishly bloodthirsty mud
Putting heart and soul on the line
Time after time after time
In horrible rhyme

Tho war demons emptied mankind's very core spilled
All innocence long ago killed
Displaying heroic bravery
Paid homage justly, defending hallowed liberty,
Brotherly bonds of patriotic justice thrilled
In fear and guilt filled
Answered their country’s call with fidelity's fealty
This band of brothers with child-like duty
Nurtured ties of a special kind
That to the eternities bind.

Brothers united solemnly still stand
Venerable veterans in brotherhood's band
Against all others in their hearts still bear
A knowledge none can fully know that were not there
For war was a blistering of the eternal soul
Rose colored glasses of youth destroyed, you know
Some brothers still after that vengeful beasts dice roll
Still cannot put back together fragmented man whole
Lost defending a country more than life they love
Reaping special reward in Celestial courtyards above.

by Gary Jacobson

Sunday, October 22, 2006

For Ebyjo...

Okay another quick post. I'm trying to take a weekend break here and watch some football, catch up on a few things, and hang out with my "Happy Tree Friends..."

This video sort of reminds me of the time Ebyjo and I competed against each other in a certain marksmanship 'game' a few months back...

I'm in no way sexist [as per the title], but this is hilarious...

Another Pic of Gunz in His Marine Days!!!

Here is another pic of Gunz that I found, while he was in the Corps. heehee...

I have been teasing him about this picture for a few days and I can't keep it to myself any longer! It seems strange to actually post something! I almost forgot my password. lol...Oh well, football season is almost over!!! I might get a break...maybe...

Laters!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Brought to you by the letter "R"

After reading some of the most ridiculous comments I've ever read over at some of my fellow bloggers that were left by some of the most clueless left wing libbers this country has to offer, I decided to break it down to their level...

It appears that after countless attempts of trying to educate and slap these moonbats into reality that this is a religious war, and it is definately a war of good vs. evil, they still don't get it.

Since this an obvious case of A.A.D.D. they seem to me to be very "special."



...Lets break it down to where they MIGHT understand it a little better.

See M-U-S-L-I-M-S pray, See M-U-S-L-I-M-S hate, See M-U-S-L-I-M-S kill, See M-U-S-L-I-M-S lie, See M-U-S-L-I-M-S fight, See M-U-S-L-I-M-S meet Allah...

How to Incite Muslims to Violence:
1.Make an oblique reference to a 14th century discussion about Muslims and violence.
2.Befriend a Muslim girl.
3.Draw a cartoon suggesting Muslims have a tendency toward violence.
4.Write a novel.
5.Hand out candy to Muslim children.
6.Make a Documentary about Muslim violence.
7.Publish a phony story about flushing the Koran down a toilet.
8.Or, just wait for Ramadan to come around.
HT2 libsgonewild.com



Any Questions?

That concludes today's lesson and don't forget to do your homework.

Friday, September 15, 2006


FIREARMS REFRESHER COURSE

1. An armed person is a citizen. An unarmed person is a subject.
2. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.
3. Colt---- The original point and click interface.
4. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.
5. If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?
6. If guns cause crime, then pencils must cause misspelled words.
7.' Free' people do not ask permission to bear arms.
8. If you don't know your rights you don't have any.
9. Those who trade liberty for security have neither.
10. The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights reserved.
11. What part of 'shall not be infringed' do you not understand?
12. The Second Amendment is in place in case the politicians ignore the others.
13. 64,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.
14. Guns only have two enemies: rust and politicians.
15. Know guns, know peace, know safety. No guns, no peace, no safety.
16. You don't shoot to kill; you shoot to stay alive.
17. 911 - government sponsored Dial-a-Prayer.
18. Assault is a behavior, not a device.
19. Criminals love gun control -- it makes their jobs safer.
20. If guns cause crime, then matches cause arson.
21. Only a government that is afraid of its citizens tries to control them.
22. You only have the rights you are willing to fight for.
23. Enforce the 'gun control laws' we have, don't make more.
24 When you remove the people's right to bear arms, you create slaves.
25. The American Revolution would never have happened with gun control.
26. "..A government of the people, by the people, for the people..."

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Evolution of Math

You may not be a "math person" like I am, but read this through to the end. It is interesting and pretty accurate...

Last week I purchased a value meal at McDonald's for $3.58. The counter girl took my $4.00 and I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She just stood there, holding the nickel and 3 pennies. While looking at the screen on her register, I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but she hailed the manager for help. While she tried to explain the transaction to her, she started to cry.

Why am I telling you this?

Because of the evolution in the teaching of math since the 1950's:

Teaching Math in 1950

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. Whis is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1960

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?

Teaching Math in 1970

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?

Teaching Math in 1980

A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.

Teaching Math in 1990

A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes? (There are no wrong answers.)

Teaching Math in 2000 (NCLB)

A corporate logger desroys the woodlands to make a profit. Define the cost and profit of his company if you double the destroyed woodland area. Define the cost and profit of his company if you tripled the destroyed woodland area. Mark the appropriate desecrated animal habitats and create a more efficient woodland area. (If you answer this question wrong the Federal Government will come in and your teachers will all be fired and your school shut down, while the school buses you to another school 200 miles away that you will hate even more than you hate this school.)

Teaching Math in 2010

Un ranchero vende una carretera de madera por $100. El cuesto de la produccion es $80. Cuantas tortillas se puede comprar?

Friday, September 01, 2006

Wanna date my daughter heh?

This is a special post for a particular teenage daughter of mine who is growing up to dang fast. A birthday is just around the corner and I believe I heard something that rhymed with 'DATE' come out of her mouth just the other day. Well, because I'm such a loving and understanding father I say sure sweet heart, and after you read this I expect a BIG hug and kiss for the compassion I am about to show. Make sure you give him the URL because I WILL ask!


"Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine."



Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my truck?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Football games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a sand dune in a Middle Eastern Desert. When my PTSD starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

With that being said sweetie, please copy the application below and have the young man in question fill it out and return it to me promptly...

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Name:___________________________ Date of Birth:______________________ Height:____________ Weight:____________ I.Q.___________ GPA:_________ Social Security Number:___________________ Driver's License #:____________ Boy Scout Rank:___________________________________________________ Home Address:____________________________ City:____________________ State:____________________________ Zip Code:_______________________ How far can you run: 40 yards?_______________ 2 miles?___________________ Do you own a (A)Van?____ (B)Truck with oversized tires?_____ (C)Waterbed?_____ Do you have an earing, nose ring or belly button ring?__________ Tatoo?_________ NOTE: If you answered YES to any part of questions #8, discontinue the application process and leave the premises! In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?__________________________ _______________________________ In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you? _________________________________________________________ In 50 words
or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you? ___________________________________________________Church you Attend:___________________ How often do you attend?_________When would be the best time to interview your father, mother and minister?_________ Answer by filling in the blanks. Please answer freely. All answers are confidential. (That means I won't tell anyone, ever) If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is the__________. If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is___________________________. A Women's place is in the _________________________. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is__________________. In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like______________to be contacted. My greatest fear is__________________________________________. When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice about her is her___________________. NOTE: If the answer to the last question begins with a "B", discontinue the application process and leave the premises. Keep your head low; running in a serpentine fashion is advised. What do you want to be "IF" you grow up?____________________________ Have you ever been fingerprinted?______ Had a DNA sample taken and recorded?_______ Your dentist is____________ Emergency phone #____________.

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT, UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE AND/OR HOT POKERS.

Signature________________________ Thank you for your interest. Please allow 5-7 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write. (It could cause disqualification and injury to your body.)

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Out for a while

Family, Friends, and Loved Ones,

Gunz and I will not be around for the next few days. Gunz is really sick, I have never seen him so bad and the damn VA wont do anything but give him appointments a month away. Everytime he goes he gets another medical student who doesn't know crap about him and he has to start the process all over. They only want to give him pills and send him for yet another stupid test!

I am getting him away from them and getting him appointments with regular doctors. Please pray for him. Please pray! He needs it so much.

If you would like, you may leave a message here and I will respond when I can.

Thanks,

Ebyjo

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Why Women Live Longer Than Men!!!

Yes I know ladies this is shocking...but it is true...
We out live men!
Here are a few examples of why....

Men...*sighs*...We have the duct tape ready, and the hospital on speed dial!!!

Gunz baby..."Yut, yut, oohrah, devil dog, semper fi!"


#7
("Jackstands? Hah! Who needs 'em?")



#6
(Necessity is the mother of invention...
but sometimes Necessity should use birth control!)



#5
("And to think... those wimps at the power company
use straps and cleats to get up this high!")



#4

(I'm sure this guy still wonders why he got fired that day.)



#3
("Gee, guys... that seems like an awful lot of protective gear
for such a small chlorine gas leak...")



#2
(Step 1: Remove shoes. Step 2: Place metal ladder in water.
Step 3: Begin using power tools while standing barefoot on metal ladder in water.)




And the winner is...
(How drunk do you have to be before
this starts looking like a good idea?)




HEEHEE!!!

PS. I'll fix the pictures when blogger isn't being such a Hillary Clinton!!!

Friday, July 28, 2006

Welcome and come on in...

Well, what to say? It's been a little while but we're up and running now. Ebyjo and I have joined forces as you can tell. So what do you think about our new home? I think Blue Bird Blogs done a super fine job in designing it, and my heart felt thanks goes out to her in particular. I wanna thank Bushwack and Samurai for allowing me to post on their respective blogs and that pistol is the personal property of one Bushwack also. I want to thank Texas Fred for his help with the blog rolls and the spinning Eagle, Globe, and Anchor. Thank you Sues for the Eagle with the Marine Corps cap on and Gawfer for helping me/us through prayer while I had some personal issues going on relating to the Gulf War. Thanks to Jarhead and Cary for keeping this Marine motivated in ways they have no clue about. The list goes on and on literally.

This blog will incorporate both mine and Ebyjo's ideologies which are so close it's scary, but you know what both of us used to post so it will be close to the same type of things.

Anyway's the blog is not totally complete, but we figure we'll work on it day to day now and it's good enough to share with all of you now. Sorry for keeping it so brief, but I gotta get back to work on this thing. Semper Fi to all and thanks for the support everyone gave.

Rightwing Guy I'll get your blog roll up but need new codes.



Updated: Having technical difficulties... 2 blog rolls disppeared, some links and sues pic that she gave me. Sheeesh. Enemies already, is that you CAIR?

Hello Again!

Hello Again! We are back up and running, and Lord help your eyes and ears as you listen to our rants and raves. I would like to thank everyone for the well wishes for Gunz and I for the kind emails. We truly appreciated them. I promised Gunz I would keep it short and sweet...So...

*Bell Ring*

THEIR OFF!!!
commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.